Dental anxiety isn’t a character flaw. You shouldn’t be embarrassed about it. It’s a real response, and it’s more common than most people realize.
If you’ve been avoiding the dentist, you’re not alone. The reasons are almost always the same. Fear of pain, fear of judgment, and fear of being told you need work you can’t afford. Or just the vague, uncomfortable feeling that something bad is going to happen in that chair.
Dr. Paul Chaiken has been practicing dentistry for more than 30 years. He’s treated patients in Skokie and Chicago through every version of dental fear. Over those decades, he’s learned that the most important thing you can do for an anxious patient isn’t technical. It’s human.
Here’s what those 30 years have taught him, and what it means for you if you’ve been putting off care.
Lesson 1: Anxiety Doesn’t Look the Same in Everyone
Some patients tell you right away that they’re nervous. They mention it at the front desk or in the chair. Others don’t say a word. They’re calm and polite on the outside, but their blood pressure is up, and their hands are clenched.
Dr. Chaiken has learned to read the quiet signs. The patient who grips the armrests. The one who flinches when the chair reclines. The one who asks a lot of questions upfront, trying to control the situation. These aren’t signs of being difficult. They’re signs of fear.
The first thing he does is acknowledge it. Not clinically, but humanly. “I can see you’re not looking forward to this. Let’s take it slow.” That one sentence can change the entire visit.
Lesson 2: The Waiting Room Matters More Than You Think
For patients with anxiety, the visit starts before they sit in the chair. It starts in the parking lot. Sometimes it starts days before the appointment.
The Skokie dental office at Old Orchard Shopping Center was designed with that in mind. It’s meant to feel calm, not clinical. The staff knows to greet patients warmly and avoid the rushed, transactional tone that worsens anxiety. Small things make a difference, like being called by name, being offered a moment to settle in, and being told what’s going to happen next before it happens.
Dr. Chaiken has learned that anxiety doesn’t start when the drill turns on. It starts long before, and you can ease it long before, too.
Lesson 3: Numbing Works Better When You’re Not Tense
This one is technical but important. When a patient is tense, their muscles are tight. Their jaw is clenched. Their whole body is bracing. That makes numbing more difficult and less effective.
When a patient is relaxed, everything works better. The injection hurts less. The numbing takes hold faster. The procedure goes more smoothly. That’s why anxiety management isn’t just a nice thing to do. It’s a clinical advantage.
Dr. Chaiken uses a few techniques to help patients relax before numbing. He explains what he’s doing, gives patients a moment to breathe, and uses topical numbing gel before the injection so they don’t feel the needle. For patients with significant anxiety, he offers sedation options, including nitrous oxide, that help them stay calm throughout the visit.
Lesson 4: Some Patients Need a Different Kind of First Visit
For patients who’ve been avoiding the dentist for years, a full cleaning and exam on the first visit can be overwhelming. There’s too much going on, too many instruments, and too many unknowns.
Dr. Chaiken has learned to offer a different on-ramp. For some patients, the first visit is just a conversation. Sitting in the consultation room, talking about what’s been going on, and getting to know each other.
The second visit might focus on one specific concern. The third visit might be a cleaning. Each step builds trust. By the time a patient is ready for more involved treatment, they’re no longer walking into the unknown. They’re walking into a familiar place with people they know.
That approach takes longer. It requires more appointments, but for patients who’ve been scared for years, it’s the only way through.
Lesson 5: Judgment Is the Enemy of Care
One of patients’ biggest fears is being judged. “You haven’t been to a dentist in five years. Why not? What have you been doing?”
Dr. Chaiken doesn’t ask those questions. Not because he doesn’t care about the answer, but because the answer doesn’t change anything. Whatever kept you away, you’re here now. The only useful question is: what do we do next?
That’s the message we want every anxious patient to hear. We’re not here to make you feel bad about where you’ve been. We’re here to help you get where you want to be.
Why This Experience Matters for Skokie Patients
Skokie has a lot of dental practices. P&E Dental, Vista Dental, and dozens of others all offer care in the area. On paper, many of them offer the same dental services.
What you can’t see on a website is how a dentist handles an anxious patient. Whether they slow down when you need them to, explain what’s happening before it happens, and let you pause in the middle of a procedure. Whether they treat you like a person or like a case.
Dr. Chaiken’s 30+ years have shaped how he practices in ways that aren’t visible on a service list. His advanced training in sedation dentistry gives him options for patients who need them. His fellowship in the American College of Dentists and Academy of General Dentistry reflects a commitment to patient care that goes beyond technique. Dr. Chaiken’s work as an assistant clinical professor at Northwestern University School of Medicine keeps him connected to the latest thinking in how patients experience care.
His writing for the American Medical Association, including the AMA Complete Guide to Your Children’s Health, reflects an understanding of how fear develops and how to address it. That background informs how he treats anxious patients at every age.
Dr. Angel Frazier, who recently joined the practice, shares the same patient-focused approach. She’s completed extensive advanced training in dental implant placement and restoration and is passionate about helping patients restore both the function and beauty of their smiles. If you’ve been avoiding care because you’re worried about the outcome, she’s another reason to feel confident about booking.
What to Do If You’ve Been Avoiding the Dentist
Here’s what we’d tell you. Don’t start with a cleaning. Start with a conversation.
Call our Skokie office at 224-298-7907 or request an appointment online and tell us you’re nervous. That’s it. We’ll schedule a low-pressure visit. You can meet Dr. Chaiken, ask questions, and sit in the chair without anyone looking in your mouth. When you’re ready for the next step, we’ll take it.
We’re at 4905 Old Orchard Shopping Center, Suite 535, Skokie, IL 60077. We welcome patients from Skokie, Evanston, Niles, Morton Grove, and across the North Shore.
You don’t have to be ready for everything. You just have to be ready for the first step. We’ll take it from there.